The Professional Bar of Recruiting

(Audio version here)

You know why I don't play that cool jazz for an introduction on The Recruiting Animal Show that a lot of shows use? It's because we aren't cool, we're hot. This is a hot show. A fun show. But, you know, a lot of people they don't get that. All they want to do is make themselves look good. You know what I'm saying? So let me tell you a little story about what happened to me recently.

There was a novice recruiter who was very ambitious and she wanted to punch above her weight and play in the deep end as quickly as possible. So, she asked me if she could come on this show and I said "Of course, you can dear". And she was very excited at the thought of playing with the big boys. But her so-called pals didn't think she could handle it and they immediately started bugging me to lower the diving board.

"Animal, I love your show," one guy told me, "But you're scaring people away. Everyone thinks you're the enemy and pretty soon you won't be able to get any guests."

"Oh no!" I said, "What should I do?".

"Well," he said, "You should lob your guests some easy questions and then just let them talk."

"You mean I should let them ramble on and say whatever they want? And if your little friend wants to deliver a canned speech about recruiting kindergarten, I should just let that happen. Is that what you're saying?"

"Yes, yes," he said, "Exactly. It's going to be really interesting."

Well she came on and even though these losers, who have no respect for my audience, tried to lob her cues for canned answers it still turned out to be a pretty good show. I liked it and I'm a tough judge. You ask Dave Manaster. He had to talk me down from the ledge many times in the early days (over Instant Messenger).

So then, this girl gets on her video diary and delivers an academy awards acceptance speech for her performance on the show. And who does she thank? The Recruiting Animal for making her interesting? No! She thanks all those other guys who tried to bring the show down!

And what does she say about me? "Well," she said, "I think I proved that I know my stuff. Even though The Recruiting Animal Show is not a professional bar."

Not a professional bar? What does that mean? Let's look at the panel on that show. First of all, there was me. And what am I, borscht? And Maureen Sharib and David Manaster. What are they, chopped liver? And Clifford Mintz. He's got a PhD for Pete's sake.

Of course, Dennis and Paul were there too and they're pretty smart guys but they blew their brains out before they arrived. I don't know what happened but they turned into a couple of lapdogs. Actually, I do know what happened (and so do you) but I don't want to say it in public and embarrass them.

You know, a few days ago, I was talking to Jessica Lee on Twitter and she told me she doesn't like my show. She likes the hard stuff, she said. And I said, "Honey, I've got news for you. I am the hard stuff." So listen, you guys out there in Recruiterland, if you cant take it, stick with the gingerale! 'Cause this is the Recruiting Animal Show not Tiny Talent Time.

And as far as I know, the only professional bar in recruiting is the kind that serves chicken wings. But if superstars go there, you're going to find today's guest leaning against it. His name is Craig Silverman and we all know him as the Executive Vice President of Hireability but now he's got a new job and he's going to tell us what he had to do to get it.

So all you kiddies, it's time to change the channel or put on your diapers because I want you to join me and Craig Silverman on the Recruiting Animal Show!

Comments

[marenhogan]

Hmmm, interesting take. I too, thought the show went well. I enjoyed my time on the show and was trying to convey via video the fact that while I was and remain a "newbie" and was terrified to go on the show and display my ignorance, I was excited that I survived, made sense and didn't sound completely ignorant. After all, you served the PhD up on a platter (no offense Cliff, you still were able to get a message across, heavens knows it can't have been easy)and I did not want to have that happen to me. Yes, there are amazing folks on the show, yourself included (pompous) but what I meant was "it doesn't make me any more professional" for having survived it, except maybe in my own head. I am sorry that it hurt your feelings, please don't get your pants in a twist.

Yours,

Maren