From: How To Fight Right by Patricia Laya (edited)
Ex-Intel CEO Andy Grove was known for his constructive confrontation techniques.
Constructive confrontation does not mean being loud, unpleasant or rude, and it is not designed to affix blame.
The essence of it is to attack a problem by speaking of it in a businesslike way, Grove says.
1. Focus on facts.
2. Confront the problem, not the person.
3. The goal is to find the best solution.
Robert Sutton, the author of Good Boss, Bad Boss says:
When people fight over ideas they are more productive and creative.
Constructive fighting comes from pushing your own ideas, pounding on others' ideas, and inviting others to pound on yours too.
Pixar's director, Brad Bird, told his team: "Everyone will get humiliated and encouraged together."
Lisa Earle McLeod, author of The Triangle of Truth, says confronting a dominant personality doesn't have to start a fight.
Good questions can make any two people see the win/win side to any situation. For instance:
- Help me understand where you're coming from
- Tell me a bit about how you envision this
MY COMMENT - Have you ever asked a bossy person a question? They don't take the time to explain themselves nicely.
Comment by Julie Rains: Being disarming, humble, and encouraging are understood by some but not all.
